A Gent's Outlook

A Literary Agent Divulges the TRUTH about Publishing

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Why You Should Never Fuck on a Computer Desk

I can think of one good reason: You will lose the masterpiece that you were getting ready to post on your blog.

Yep. I didn’t have computer safe sex, and now not only is all my work lost (how her **** hit that delete key I will never figure out) but my F keys are sticking. So now you get a quicky instead of the longer, more desired read you so desperately need. Pant, pant.

Oh well, at least I don’t have prison fantasies like one of my loyal commenters (You know who you are, DK).

Just a response in reference to some comments on my last post and then I will go off on another tangent. How many times do I have to say this? Some people in this business are not out to amass a gaggle of followers for the money, although that is one of the biggest motivators. They want power. Lots of power. And then they can do whatever they want and make publishing whatever they want because their minions will spread out through cyberspace like a plague and beyond, spreading their “truth” and backing down any nay-sayers. This is how it works in all aspects of entertainment, so it is not that unusual. Just annoying. Their names on the lips of everyone, or so they believe, and that translates into book sales, baby, book sales. From wannabes, mainly. If you are looking for altruism in the publishing industry, you are on a sad and fruitless journey, my friend. Woe is you. Woe is you.

And don’t forget, just because Snarkalina and friends (hint) haven’t published books yet doesn’t mean that they won’t. I can just see the whole pathetic production now, including giddy fans and even my long-awaited “I told you so” post. However, I do have to give Snarky just a little credit. She has built a huge following, indeed, which is quite a feat for someone like her. She could actually come out and do a book deal and I bet she wouldn’t lose any fans at all, even though, technically, that would prove that I was right about her and…well, her, anyway, using the blog to build up a fan base for just that very purpose. But who am I to say anything? Just little ol’ Sammy She-Bammy with a terribly wicked grin. Hey, if Dr. Phil can nearly cripple people with diet and exercise, I am sure Snarky could continue to abuse writers under her real name and they would eat it up, making her the Oprah of the Wannabe Kingdom. Just what the world needs—yet another addition to the ranks of the pundits. Can’t wait for that shit.

Along those lines, someone (okay, a bunch of someones) commented and e-mailed that I offer nothing to writers but negativity, which is absolutely not true. Everything you need to know is right here in this blog, and if you don’t get it, at least get a clue that you’re a dumbfuck.

That’s all the cynicism I can spare for now. Besides, I think, from the look on my little darlin’s face, that it looks like I might have to buy a brand new keyboard tomorrow.

With a wink and a smile--Sammy

5 Comments:

  • At 4:38 PM, Blogger empty_boxes said…

    You I like...

     
  • At 5:50 PM, Blogger Dave Kuzminski said…

    Yeah, sure, Sammy. In the meantime, Google likes me... a lot. Just try Googling on DaveKuzminski (don't use any spaces) and then read some of the comments in the links it shows. Then try it with VictoriaStrauss (again, no spaces).

    Now I'm going to try Googling SammyK and see if Google warns visitors not to step in it. :)

     
  • At 10:14 PM, Anonymous eggs said…

    Geeze Sammy - two post in a row! Be careful, or you'll turn into Snarkalina's bitch, and you gotta know she'd love that.

     
  • At 5:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    And Snark is quoting other blogs so she can include them in her book.

     
  • At 11:03 PM, Blogger Jessica said…

    That looks great!! Spacify offers wide range of Computer Desks in modern and classic designs for your office or in home.

     

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