A Gent's Outlook

A Literary Agent Divulges the TRUTH about Publishing

Saturday, October 01, 2005

I'm Here for You, Baby!

Oh, I’ve heard it before! “I want to be there for you Writ-tas. I get all warm and fuzzy when I think that I might help someone.”

Translation: I get warm and fuzzy when you flock to me and make me rich beyond my wildest dreams.

Folks, I don’t know if you understand this yet or not, but I’m here to tell that agents don’t really like each other. And you say, “Oh noooo, Sammy, this cannot be true!!” Oh, but it is, my little rumcakes. And even as I say it, the many clamber louder, “But there’s the AAR, right? It’s like a club and so fine and true. And the members have parties and eat at each other’s houses and celebrate each other’s successes, and…”

God, I hate to burst your bubbles, but, honestly, we just don’t get along. Why? Because agents compete for those precious few of you who write well enough to make us money. Those who can really write are a rare commodity, and, like those gold miners—those nasty ‘49ers—we jump claims and steal the golden ones from each other. We do it cause we love ya’, okay? (big hugs all around)

So don’t perpetuate that crap about “I’m only here for you”, lovely blogging agent dears. The wool itself has eyes—even a wolf can see that. Wink, wink.


  • At 6:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

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  • At 9:42 AM, Blogger Bernita said…

    Writers are told constantly not to take rejections personally, not to get all emotionally upset, that it's business.
    Then they are told they must find an agent who "loves" their book, one who gets all emotional about it, enough to make like Michael with the Sword. Sometimes an agent will say it was a good commercial prospect, but they "didn't love it enough."
    This confuses many writers.


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